December 31, 1742

1742 December 31 (Friday).  Brother Hicks return’d to Sutton.  Bright and pleasant.  Through Divine Goodness and Mercy I felt very comfortably and was Chearfull.  At Eve Captain Eager and Lieutenant Holloway here, who had not been to see me in all my sickness, and Scarcely any other North Side men, though many had rid by my Door.  However I was glad to see ‘em at last.  Receiv’d a Letter from Brother Breck dated the 27th.  He writes that all New Light is almost Extinct — and God grant that all New Light may be, intirely that the Old the true Gospel Light may Shine forth the more gloriously and victoriously!  Now I come to finish the Year, what Shame and Sorrow I had need to be fill’d with for my Ingratitude, unprofitableness and insensibility, when God has been so wondrous patient, So mercifull, So faithfull, So abundant in Goodness towards Me!  How graciously he has conducted me through all the Changes of the Year!  and in Special, let me never forget his Mercifull and Compassionate Beliefs in my Sickness, So that Neither my Rheumatism, nor my Fever prevail’d upon Me!  O that I might know the mind and will of God concerning me!  and what shall I render to him for all his Benefits towards Me!  The Lord prepare my Heart to render as I ought.  But O may my great Redeemer both wash me from my sins in his own Blood, and grant me the gracious and Sanctifying influences of his Blessed Spirit.  Without these I can neither be acceptable in his sight, nor offer any Thing to His Glory.