Month: September 1729

1729 September 4.[1]  How Shall I best employ my Self to Day?  It being the last Day of my 26th Year.

 

Answer 1.  In Solemnly Praising God for his mercies throughout my Life, particularly in the Course of this Year.

 

2. In humbling my Self for my Sins especially those of this Year.

 

3. In preparing my Self for Tomorrow’s Business. Reading over what I have heretofore done, and what others have transacted, on Such Dayes, etc.  All which may be well assisted (perhaps) by waiting upon the Exercises of the private Meeting at Mr. David Brighams to Day (when I am very much importun’d to be present).  But (alas) the weakness of my Body, and the Confusion of my mind at Seeing So much Business to do, and So Slender Ability to accomplish it!  But besides, Providence calls me to Work for others, as well as for my Self to Day.  I must attend to what may fit me there fore, and then Return to my private Concerns.  The Grace of God enable me, under my Infirmities, and magnifie His Power through my Weakness!

[1]All entries for Sept. 1729 are from the Natalitia.

1729 September 5.  1.  Bless God for the Light and Liberties of This Morning, and petition Direction and assistance in Such an Observation of the Day as may be most for the Divine Glory, and my Souls Comfort.

2. Let the Exercises of the Family (although not formally or noticeably by others) contribute as much as may be to the Holy Business of this Day.
3. Thankfully review the Divine Mercie to me and mine through my Life past, particularly Such as we have receiv’d in the Course of this Year, and Solemnly offer unto God the Praise. Read and Sung Ps. 145 in Tate’s Version.
4. Bewail my Iniquities before God.
   1. Sin, in General: its
      1. Turpitude, Vileness, and Offensiveness especially to God most Holy and glorious
      2. Fatal Consequences.
   2. In Particular:
      1. 1. The Sin of my Nature, and thereby
            1. The Weakness and Darkness of my Intellectual Powers;
            2. The Perverseness and Corruptness of my Elective Powers.
         2. The Foolishness and wickedness of my Childhood and youth
            1. 1. Falseness.  Ps. 58.3.  Brother William, Mr. Fl. [?], Mr. L.[?]
            2. Thievishness, apples, corn.
         3. The Vainness, Impurity and Impiety of my Youth and more Mature age.
            1. The Vainness in
               1. Dress
               2. Company
               3. Studies:  Romances and Tales;Poems and Playes.
               4. Waste of Time.  Impertinence. Walking about Town, etc. See my Journals No. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.
            2. The Impurity.
               1. Heart uncleanness and adulterie, through The Eye –- Pictures, etc; The Ear — Songs, etc.
               2. Wantonness in Carriage and Actions in various Instances and Respecting which I have Great Cause Exceedingly to bewail.
            3. Impiety.
               1. Restraining Prayer sometimes.
               2. Superficial performance of that and other Duties and formal attendance upon ordinances, The Word,Sacraments, etc.
               3. Unaffectedness at Providences, Mercys — publick, private
                  1.   Public Calamities.
                  2.   Personal Sufferings.
                  3.   Domestic and Relative Evils, Deaths, Sickness, etc. My Father, Mother, etc., etc.
            4. Unfaithfullness of my whole Life unto
               1.   God, under
                  1. My Baptismal Covenant.
                  2. My Covenant of September 15, 1719.
                  3. My Profession Engagements, March 31, 1723
                  4. My Marriage Covenants.  July 7, 1724 and September 1, 1737.
                  5. My Ordination Vows, October 28, 1724, O.S.
                  6. My frequent, especially September 5, Pretences and daily Devotions (which are so many Engagements) to Walk with God.
                  7. Special Providences, as
                     1. Mercies: Deliverances and Recoveries, to me, my wife, children and other Relatives – and to my Friends.
                     2. Afflictions.  Sickness and pains: my own, my Wife’s my childrens.
               2. Man, unto
                  1. Parents, Brothers, Sisters.
                  2. Acquaintance and Friends.
                  3. Christians in Communion with me.
                  4. Wife
                  5. Children and Servants.
                  6. People of Westborough and other Congregations where I have preach’d.
                  7. Neighbours.
            5. My self, as to (1) My Outward, (2) and (3) Spiritual and Eternal Interests.  My Unfaithfullness, Impiety, etc. of my more mature Life may be further set down in this form following.
               1.   My Hypocrisie and Insincerity.
               2.   My Slender, partial Obedience.
               3.   Neglect of Divine Dealings with me
               4.   Covetousness, Love of the World and Disrelish of Divine Things.
               5.   Disquietness, Discontent and Envying.
               6.   Slothfullness and Idleness. Unseasonable Sermonizing.
               7.   Forbearing to reprove Sin, through Fear, Favour.
               8.   Unsabbatical Behaviour.
               9.   Equivocating.
               10.   Eating and Drinking more than answer’d the Ends to be propos’d therein and what I count Exceeding Christian Laws therein.
               11.   Breaking out to angry Resentments.
               12.   Vain Glory, Self Conceit and Self Dependence.
               13.   Detractions.
               14.   Unbelief.

          

         The Fifth Thing on this Day was that which next followeth, and which was in this Form.

          

         5.[1]  Whereas it hath pleased the Almighty Author of my Being and the God of my Life out of his abundant mercy and Grace, to permit my Lot in a Land of Gospel Light, my Birth of Religious Parents, my Dedication to Him Early by Baptism, and my Education not only in the Nurture and instruction of the Lord, but with some peculiar happy Circumstances, both to fit me for and Engage me to His Service and Glory.  Since also I have openly profess’d my Self a Disciple of Christ and in a Sacred manner bound my Self to the Strict observance of His Divine Commands, and have been Moreover, with utmost Solemnity Consecrated and Set apart to Him and his peculiar work.  To all which the Dispensations of his Providence of Grace have been added and conspir’d together to affect me with my indispensable obligations to Fidelity to Him.  But inasmuch as by too many Evidences it appears that without the special Restraints and Assistances of Divine Grace, my natural Corruption proves many times prevalent over all my Professions and Resolutions and even my most Sacred Ties; that I may do whatever in me lies for the [illegible] thereof, and that I may be the better defended against future Assaults and Temptations (Yet without Relying on any other Endeavours of Mine, but only upon the Mediation and Merits of my Blessed Lord Jesus Christ and the Aid of His Spirit) I would, as the best revealed Expedient, in Sacred Form Renew my Covenant with God and Solemnly Sign this Instrument.  [N.B. The then design’d Instrument is that in page 2, but it was not drawn out till some time after this, though I now renew’d my Covenant Dedication.]

          

         [1]This additional entry for Sept. 5, 1729 is also from the Natalitia.