September 4, 1754

1754 September 4 (Wednesday).  Sir Haven was here yesterday, and lodg’d at my sons last night.  Was here again today and din’d with us.  I have been in a great deal of deep Concern about how to dispose of Billy.  He Seems not willing to resume his Books except I can keep him wholly to ‘em — which our present Circumstances forbid.  His Mothers Consent to Learning for him, is hard to obtain.  It grieves me much to give him up — But as he was yesterday Clearing at the Island Pasture, So there he goes to Day.  P.M. Mr. Jonathan Forbush here again about the Pew which he drew for me — is not willing to give me a Title to it except the Precinct will let him have the Same privilege in the Meeting House as if he had not drawn it, since he drew it, as they all knew, for me, but appears desirous of it himself.  Lieutenant Bruce comes here to conferr about building the Pews, and I agree with him to provide a Stick of Timber for My Part of the Foundation.  I discern So much of the minds of persons about this Matter of the Pew that I am very much dispos’d to give it up, though there are So many Reasons impelling to keep it.  Such Tokens of Ingratitude are very grievous — But how much it is the Lot of Ministers in these days!  May God himself be pleas’d to look with Pity on his own Cause!